recent wrestlings

California and Texas and our "isms"

2009-04-13T10:07:00.001-07:00

I moved in August of last year for many reasons, but a large interest of mine was to experience the thoughts and spirituality (the way a people lives life with God) of people outside of the "Bible Belt". Needless to say, experience it I have done. It is no lie that we do theology in the midst of a context, the context unquestionably shapes our theology and therefore the way we live in relation to God. Be aware, I'm about to use some sweeping generalizations in an effort to illustrate a point.

If there are a few things I have noticed it's that the Church in California demands tolerance (for the sake of the gospel, no less), while Texas is still leery of it, if not demanding the opposite (for the sake of the gospel, of course). Speaking of that, I once heard a preacher quote G.K Chesterton, who said, "tolerance is the virtue of a man without conviction." How do you read it? Try that on a pregnant teenager walking down Lake avenue who got kicked out of her house and has no place to go. A warm bath and wise counsel would be more appropriate than exercised conviction. California screams environmentalism as the crux of the gospel, Texas is starting to think it's sorta cool, but rejects global warming (due to the sovereignty of God?). The Church in California pushes hard for ethnic diversity (and even pushes those who are trying hard to experience it) , while the Church in Texas may think it's more practical to worship with those who we are most alike (although, most folks my age can all speak boldly about how we WANT to be in an ethnically diverse community). The same social gospel that tore the offense of Cross out of the message of Christ is alive and well in California, but it still hits the deaf ear of most Texas churches (unless they have a nice program or home group that heads up that "need")...I might have hit every church stereotype there is on that one...except the one where we all keep saying "evangelicalism" but none of us have a clue what that means anymore...

My highlighting these issues isn't to pull the rug out from under any "perspective" (as if I have enough wisdom, clout, or desire to do so anyhow), but hopefully to be a voice of concern that nods respectfully to both and then carries on in angst for unity and for Christ. My goal in writing today is to recognize the tension that should exist in these things, and therefore let that tension call us all to be changed by the gospel. I meet a lot of students at Fuller who have no idea what it is to be disciplined in anything relating to God (because that's religion and God hates it?). I meet a lot of people here at Fuller whose speech is no different from mine when I was in high school. How on earth does that happen? However, I have friends here whose hearts are so compassionate and missional they they would creep up on Mother Teresa if she wasn't looking. There are women (and men) at Fuller who make the "role of women" sermon look ridiculous (yes, that sermon), not by argumentation, but by lifestyle. Please quote Ephesians 5. I did. See what I mean about context? Why would one be comfortable with a woman as a lead pastor, when they have never seen one before? On the other hand, I had friends at Dallas who knew more Scripture than I ever will, because they knew what it is to be disciplined in study and faithful in devotion. I had professors at Dallas who think drinking is sinful, but they cried like a baby in class because they longed so much for people to know Jesus! I think that's beautiful. How do you read it? Context shapes ones hermeneutic and God reigns over both.

A brilliant man said it like this: we all approach Scripture with our -ism (feminism, conservatism, liberalism, environmentalism, etc.), the challenge is whether we are allowing Scripture to inform our -ism or our -ism to inform Scripture. We all have basic convictions that won't change, but we also have a lot of "middle things" that we would benefit from changing if we could just put on someone else's shoes for a moment...

So whether California or Texas, God uses both. Whether conservative or liberal, God uses both. Whether complementarian or egalitarian, God uses both. If there is one thing that I have experienced in my schooling both at Dallas and at Fuller, it's that wherever I am in faith, I see only one side of the ball. I don't think it means that we are always wrong, but perhaps it means that God is bigger. Perhaps it means we can only see dimly, so why pretend we see a lot? For the Texan in me, there is a strong yearning to be like Lot in a land like Sodom (a disciplined life); but the Californian in me calls me to run with passion for justice in world (a life of social concern). Perhaps the Spirit urges and provides room for both to dialogue and change. Oh that Christ would come sharply into focus and tangibly into this messy masterpiece he calls the Church. I pray that we know more of Christ and less of most other things.

I guess it's poetic?

2008-12-07T09:29:00.000-08:00

Justice
I, like Ahaz, fear.
I meet you at the upper pool,
But leave your wisdom where I found it.

The justice you desire
I leave in my pocket next to my keys.
I leave it there almost reaching for it, but never actually doing it.
I leave it there in my prayers too.
Every now and then my heart stirs to exercise it,
But my will always chooses safety over risk, wealth over poverty, keeping over giving, and silence over words.
Indeed, “in my fast I seek my own pleasure, and oppress your people.”
How, with these words do I live?

I read your words of restoration and judgment.
Oh how convenient my constant restoration
And, how coincidental my unfamiliarity with judgment.
I know restoration like my name,
I know judgment like I know hunger.
Perhaps Ahaz knew at least some guilt?
I simmer guilt and conviction until they smell like righteousness,
And then, I serve them to friends as appetizers,
Instead of giving them the real me.
I wouldn’t know the difficulty of homelessness,
Because I’ve always had a home.
I wouldn’t know the pain of hunger,
Because I’ve always known gluttony.
I wouldn’t know the challenge of orphans to fit in,
Because I’ve always been accepted.

Father, you may be screaming judgments,
But I’m so convinced that you love me
I can’t imagine discipline.

Mission
The word in itself is confused.
Misunderstood, misused.
We make it all about the food,
Or all about conversion.
Neither satisfy you.
Some bend human necks toward your truth out of fear.
Others do so out of anger.
A few do so out of love.

A pretty check mark soothes my conscience
As I sign my name on the line,
As I put the letter in the mail.
Now I can forget it ‘til next month.
Praise God.

We can breath better if we create programs,
Instead of engendering a universal urge to care.
“Let a few do it.”
“It’s not my gift.”
“We have needs here, too.”
Ignorance prevents compelling.
Pride prevents understanding.
It’s at the heart of You with other things.
It’s not just near it.

Restoration
Muddy, filthy, tired, worn.
Cold, gloomy, bitter, voiceless.

I’m tired from screaming.
Freezing from the cold rain. Wet.
Left alone in the darkness to fend for myself.
I’ve climbed and walked and ran for years.
I’ve worn these same shoes and walked every kind of road.
I’ve searched for this place that my father talked about, but haven’t found it.

You speak of vineyards and built houses.
You speak of age-old trees.
You speak of wolves and lambs together.
I don’t see it. All I see is my own misery.
Clean, sharp, rested, new.
Warm, bright, sweet, boisterous.

I’m renewed from fighting.
The corner that you found me in is a memory. I’m dry.
I’m no longer alone, but in a coffee shop with community.
The climbing and walking and running isn’t over, but it’s not alone.
The shoes I wear are often traded with friends so the roads seem shorter.
You found me in my giving up, you found in my fathers prayers.

I see your planting vineyards and building houses.
I can imagine the joy of living as old as trees.
I can pray for the playing of wolves and lambs.
I trust it. I see you in the struggle.

2008-10-28T14:39:00.000-07:00

old people and young people

2008-06-03T12:15:00.000-07:00

Oh man. If you had just seen what I just saw, depending on who you are, you may have cried tears of joy. I'm sitting here at Bean Town (a local coffee shop here in Sierra Madre, CA) just thinking about stuff. I look up to find the most gentle looking old man truckin' along with a sweet flannel shirt, light blue jeans (complete with the slightly tilted, massive, wallet impression from years of wear), super old fishing hat, black SAS shoes, and most importantly; he was smiling so big. It was beautiful, not because he was old, or because he looked cool, or even because he was smiling, but because he was holding hands with what had to be his little grandson. The little one was awesome in his own right. He had the normal little kid outfit on (small jeans, small t-shirt), but topped it off with a baseball cap (probably his grandad's) that was way too big for him. They were just walkin' along, enjoying the day! I smiled for so long; and thought, "what a beautiful picture." I enjoy majestic mountain views, and sunsets at the beach. I enjoy a good chocolate chip cookie with cold milk and talking until really late with friends who would die for me (and I, them). I love my family and I enjoy watching people work at something they are gifted at doing. But, I'll tell you, there is something holy about that old man walking hand-in-hand with his grandson.

I couldn't quite put my finger on WHY I thought it was holy. So, as a good Christian should, I looked through Ecclesiastes (and found only negative things...which I really enjoyed) and then Proverbs...and I found it! As only wisdom literature can do, Solomon put my untrained, wordless urging into words nicely, "Grandchildren are the crown of the aged, and the glory of children is their fathers (Proverbs 17.6)." That man was smiling, because he was wearing a crown! It wasn't an unmerited crown, it was earned through years of trial and victory, blood and tears. That old man probably sat in a little school house with a real mean teacher; and that old man probably fought in Korea or World War II. That old man knows adversity and failure, he probably knows hunger, and he most certainly knows work. He's familiar with cars, but probably only up until they all ran by computers. He probably ran track when he was in grade school, back when they were made of dirt, not rubber. He probably snuck out and got drunk with his friends, and he's probably caught his share of small-mouth bass since then. His hands used to be strong, and he used to be taller, but life has worn him down. He still smiles though! He raised children, and probably messed up a lot in doing so. But, now his kids are raising kids. What a gift. What a crown! That old man walked old-hand-in-young-hand with that little boy, and both were smiling because God created humanity for relationship and when it functions it's beautiful. It's better than a sunset on the beach or a mountain view.

That little boy (Lord willing) has a lot of life ahead of him. He'll have trials and he will probably learn failure. He will get made fun of and he'll figure out what he's good at. He may learn to fish or he may learn more about computers. He probably won't fight in a war like his grandfather, and most likely his hands won't be as hard and calloused as his grandfather's are. He may not grow up to be familiar with blatant racism or how to use a sickle to cut grass, but he might grow up to raise children of his own, and one day he might get to wear a crown like his granddad. My hope is that one day he too will walk by a stranger holding his grandson's hand, smiling.

is this the lord's supper?

2008-02-24T18:43:00.000-08:00

As you can gather from the title, there is a question I feel I need to pose. When we sit or stand in our neat little rows in the church house every few Sundays, is it the Lord's Supper that we are taking part in? Or is it more of a ritual we feel we do justice to, but don't have the wherewithal to change for the sake of practicality? I have taken a few days to process thru this question, and have come to a semi-concrete response. Yes and No. Typical seminary answer to hard questions. Before I respond I want to confirm that I believe the Lord's Supper to be a valuable and blessed sacrament in within the Church body, but I think we can do better than "chiclet gum" sized bread and just enough Welch's to bother your taste buds.

1 Corinthians 11 is what prompted the question. In this text Paul speaks not only about women(mainly) head coverings, which is a rather weak argument compared to his other statements throughout the letter, and also speaks about the Lord's Supper to close out this series of thoughts. We know from the construction of Paul's arguments throughout the letter that he is responding to both oral and written reports or letters from the congregation (1.11, 5.1, etc). He begins chapter 5, 7, 8, 12, and 16 with this phrase "now concerning" which leads us to attribute these topics to a question or topic within a letter that the Corinthians wrote to Paul earlier. So there is history between the congregation and Paul, as he defines himself as their founder and even their father (4.15). Why then does he rail them for mistreating the Lord's Supper? I mean he is pretty angry about their botching this "ceremony".

We can tell from the text that there are divisions in the community, most likely along socio-economic lines. Chapter 3 and 6 attest to the divisions, and Chapter 8 shows us the disparities in both maturity and economics. Economics because it is the rich who would be faced more often with this dilemma of choosing to eat meat that was sacrificed to idols. The poor are most likely from a pagan background and would have most likely had a strong opposition to the eating of meat sold in the markets, because it is closely associated with idols and cultic traditions. The rich are used to it and perhaps find no fault in eating it, as the see rightly that it (meat) is neutral in regards to their salvation.

From this background Paul chastises, most likely the wealthy or "strong"(8.1-12), because of their eating before other "late comers" arrive so that they cannot share what they have brought with each other. This leaves some hungry (v.21, 34) and others full, and drunk (v.24). The whole of Paul's argument in the entire letter is unity and submission to one another. Every nook and cranny is filled with Paul's cry for these two attributes to be displayed in community. Many think that everybody brought what they had to the gathering every Sunday, which met in a more wealthy person's house (perhaps Chloe), so the Lord's Supper looked more like a Pot Luck than a mini waffer or chiclet. The meal would have been opened with a common gathering, that might not have allowed everyone to sit together. This might mean that the late comers or poorer Corinthians would have been pushed to the outside of the gathering. This doesn't line up at all with Paul's hope for unity in the community. The Supper would start with the "breaking of bread" (literally) and then would be followed by possibly a Pot Luck style dinner and then followed by "drinking of the cup" and then prayer, drinking, and worship may end the gathering. Paul's vision in for the Lord's Supper is in verse 33, "So then, my brothers, when you come together to eat, wait for one another!" Paul doesn't shy from disclosing his thoughts about some dying because of their neglect of this practice that has through church history become a sacrament.

My question is regarding not whether we should practice the Lord's Supper, but how? When we gather on Sundays, communion seems to be done corporately, but experienced individually. We make sure the silver platters are shined, and the cups are filled, but where is the meal? Most object, well it's not practical to feed congregations of our size. Then, shouldn't we do some thinking about that. Some voice that we don't have the same issues that Paul addresses in chapter 11. I agree, but perhaps we SHOULD. I think that statement is a sad state of the church, not merely a different one. Why isn't there more poor folk in the church? We are dressed to the heels, and can easily remove the poor from our thoughts, because we take care of them with another ministry. Perhaps our "examining of ourselves"(v.28) before the Lord's Supper ought to provoke thoughts of provision for others in our community more so than it should be about "getting right" and then identifying with the cross of Christ.

I remember verse 30 being preached to me once, and I was afraid because I was so sinful and I was about to eat some bread and drink some grape juice. I really was nervous. I didn't want God to kill me because of some unconfessed sin! Can I contend that the examining of ourselves regards our neighbor's welfare and not our personal sin. Can I contend that our taking of the Lord's Supper might serve us in function more, if it took place downstairs in the mess hall or in lifegroups at someone's home. Can I contend that the Lord's Supper doesn't have to be a waffer and mini cup. Could it be that the grape juice may even be a bit of sticky legalism. Most of all, Paul's hope for the Lord's Supper is a gathering of believers to "proclaim the Lord's death until he comes"(v.26) and he doesn't think the Corinthians or the church today can do that too well if our friends next to us are hungry. It's not about the meal, it's about sharing in Christ as brothers and sisters. And if this is the case, then how do we do that together with a chiclet of bread and some grape juice? Is this the Lord's Supper? It can be I suppose, but can't we remember Him with a bit more than that?

ihop part 1 - college station

2007-11-06T00:17:00.000-08:00

well, at the request of wesley dorsett (fightin' texas aggie class of 2007?...whoooop. ha.) i will attempt to lay out my love for ihop in a way that is adequately expressed, but doesn't reveal too much of my lunacy. i began my love relationship with ihop (international house of pancakes) in college, and here ill lay out part one of my three part series.

IHOP OF COLLEGE STATION (pictured above)
now, in college, ihop was located at s. college and university, a prime spot for the folks who had a rough night at the bar and were attempting to knock the edge off, but it was also a short drive from my house, and a perfect walking distance from campus. silvia was the token waitress that soon became my friend. there were many nights of cheese sticks, samplers, dr. peppers, pancakes, even a cheeseburger or two, but mainly i stuck with coffee and water. coffee was the expected order when i sat down and was often brought without question. mikey and i handled more cheese sticks than was appropriate. sometimes silvia would tell the cooks that they burnt the sticks and bring us out two orders!!! holy crap. after a while there becomes this kind of connection that is founded on the people not the location or building. when silvia wasn't there, it wasn't quite home for me. i will interject there were several other waiters/waitresses at the college station ihop that made me smile, but none like my girl silvia.

but, before i dive into my friendship with silvia, can i pause and hop on a soap box? i want to say first that i am talking at myself as much as you! i am in no way close to perfection in this area, but i do think it's important and often over-looked. do you know which day of the week servers, across the board, hate working? sundays! why? because "all the church people come." i believe that to be an accurate paraphrase of a conversation that i had with some coworkers at saltgrass steakhouse, back in the day. may i just say, i think that is piss poor. my point is this...we shouldn't be perplexed when: our formulas for bringing people to christ don't work or when we find that our churches are stagnant or when we see a rise in mysticism or buddhism or islam. could it be that christianity suffers, because the "followers" of christ have a reputation that is nothing like the reputation of christ. when the server spills the drink we should pick it up, when the wait for a table is really long we should be the ones who wait with no complaining or rude comments, when the server screws up the order we should be the ones who affirm them with, "hey it's no big deal, you're doing fine." we can't expect great results from a faith that isn't exercised in the small ways and big ways alike. christians ought to be known for their kindness and generosity, not their rudeness and frugality.

back to silvia. she was great. by the end of our time together i knew so much about her, and vice versa. she would tell me things i didn't need to know and things that i did. she would tell me my outfit didn't match and which of my girl friends she thought i should date. she would go on and on about her kids and her grandkids. she carried pictures of them in her serving pad, and she would show the new ones to me every so often. silvia brought a lot of joy to my late night study sessions, not because of the free coffee and cheese sticks, but because i got to know a person and she got to know me. silvia's friendship changed my approach to how i treat people i don't know. when you take away the veil of, "hey take my order and get out of my way," a whole new world can open up. when we take the time to ask questions, be interested, and be known, we learn a lot about people, we learn a lot about ourselves, and more importantly we learn a lot about the heart of God. when we take the time to know people who don't even expect to be addressed with interest, we find out that everything is not about us. i think that being kind, open, and loving to people who don't expect you to be can be a step toward becoming like jesus; being jesus to your waiter is just one easy way that i think we neglect. it's funny that Jesus, while being God in the flesh didn't think equality with God something to be grasped, but considered himself nothing...it sucks that i often do.

sorta late night thoughts

2007-10-10T23:24:00.000-07:00

Hey People/Person-
Sittin' here on my bed, supposed to be reading a book simply titled "The Gospels", but instead I am distracted by this fantastic CD from "The Everybodyfields", given to me by my really sweet boss, aimee. There is a song on the album labeled "Good to be Home" and indeed I thought of home. I always thought, "Man! I'm so excited to get out of this place, and go to Cali or Colorado or somewhere!" But really, while a nice walk on the pier or beach does temper the sting of missing home; it doesn't replace the familiar smells and faces.

I am having a great time here and meeting some really cool people that have life stories much different than mine, but there is something sweet and mysteriously enjoyable about sitting in a place you grew up sitting, or turning on a light switch you always used to turn on and still remembering that it's higher on the wall than all the other ones. There is something "right" about driving down my street and still remembering, right before I pull in the drive way, that you have to push the garage door opener button more to the left side for it to work on the first try. Does this make sense? Weird I know, but I think these kinds of things. I don't miss familiar things too bad, but it would be "good to be home" (and don't get all theological on me and say, "well, you're not really home, Jon." Spare me).

While I understand that Nocona, Texas is not my home the aforementioned folk song made me think of it. And, I would fight a huge guard dog right now for the chance to sit on the gate at my grandpa's old piece of land and just do nothing but sit. I would. Mikey (or Michael, as I now say, because he dates) and D.O. would say, "yeah right, it would kill you."...I digress. I would do a lot of things to visit my "G's" house, in Nocona, and just sit there with her while she recounts her latest run-ins and issues. These things I have come to cherish. I would enjoy sleeping over at my Aunt Sudie's house, because she hangs the sheets out before she puts them on the bed and it smells like country air when you sleep. I would enjoy the creaking of the floor when you walk on it, because the house was built sometime around the turn of the century. It is funny to me that I have never been around so many people, and I have never thought more of how much I enjoy the country life.

That's all I wanted to say tonight. So if you are reading this and you are from my home or Nocona; I do miss you and would like to see you. Lord willing, I could see you around Christmas time. If you ever get the urge to take a 1400 mile drive to the beach or mountains, I recommend you follow the urge. Why? Because Palm trees are pretty sweet and the sand feel nice between your toes, but mainly because change is nice.

oh wow--california

2007-09-29T00:42:00.000-07:00

Hey Texans-
I thought it fitting to write a bit, simply because I haven't done it in so long. California...Wow! An amazing place, full of amazing people. I have been so thrown off, by the friendliness of folks here. I assumed that life in Pasadena (which is about 20 mins northeast of arguably the largest gathering of the most shallow sub-culture on the planet, LA) would be extremely fast paced, shallow, and impatient. Funny thing, I haven't really found those characteristics to be overtly expressed by the people here. I started to think, and then confirmed that the reason I might not see it in these people is because I possess most of those characteristics. To illustrate this point further, in college I spent many nights at George Bush pond. Many nights I played guitar till 2 a.m., some nights I would just drink my cappuccino or smoke my pipe. Regardless of what I did at George Bush pond, there were a few rules I set for myself: 1) phone stays off and in the car 2) shoes stay in the car (regardless of the temperature) 3) walk slowly. These were the rules I went by when I went to G.B. When I sat by myself beside that pond busyness and school and friends simply took a back seat. Late the other night I drove to Santa Monica beach and walked on the pier and then went down to the beach and was in the middle of my stride when I noticed that I was walking like I was trying to get somewhere.

I haven't lost my spirit of contemplation, but it has been upset lately, because I am in a place that while beautiful and refreshing is still the heartbeat of worldly success and determination to be "somebody". This "get famous or rich" mindset is so thick it's hard to catch your breath in the midst of it. School has started and I already feel the love of Christ in the community at Fuller. I was so glad to start classes and begin to be challenged again, although, this attitude may wane quickly I am currently ecstatic about the going's-on here. I am taking a NT:Gospels class taught by a freaking smart young guy who just got his Ph.D at Princeton (Princeton only accepts 2 applicants a year). He's really nice and approachable and even quite humorous, while at the same time giving off the aura of brilliance. I am also taking a class called Family Systems Dynamics, which is basically an introduction into Family Therapy. This class is taught, by Dr. Cameron Lee, who is arguably one of the top professor in the U.S. in Family Therapy. He speaks quickly and hardly skips a beat. Reminiscent of a soft spoken Mark Driscoll. Needless to say, school will be difficult, but enjoyable. I am excited most to learn the history behind the Gospels and also thrilled to learn more and more about communication.

Patagonia is going great. The folks I work with are super chill and extremely friendly. All of my co-workers are probably more green now than I will probably ever become, but they have shed so much light on my way of life. I have learned so much about recycling and the frontiers that are quickly becoming destroyed. I have been challenged in a big way. Much like what Dr. Young states when he explained a conversation he had with a theology student once about how he wasn't "called to the mission field". The student just went on and on in explanation about how he could be used in the states to encourage and exhort. The student was adamant about his calling to stay in the States and minister. Dr. Young interrupted and said, "Do you know the names of any people groups overseas that haven't heard the name of Christ?...how can you know whether you are called or are not called, when you know nothing about missions?" I am learning about living green, not because global warming is coming for us, but because with all the difficulties of life, we are blessed with a beautiful place to reside on this side of heaven. And let us not forget that, just like us immortals, all the rest of creation waits for the return of Christ, too. It's not a matter of respecting mother nature, but praising Father God. Patagonia is helping me wrestle these issues, and I am thankful for that. Also, perhaps some of it is simply because I am selfish and I want to enjoy Joshua Tree and Yosemite and the Grand Canyon on little foot paths not on sidewalks. More on this later.

I am thankful. I resolve to know nothing about my future, but pray to know more. Hullabaloo.

love

2006-12-05T20:06:00.000-08:00

so i heard chuck swindoll speak today and i almost cried like a small child. i wasnt taken back by my womanness or by my sensitivity to his stories (ive always kinda been a girl in that regard), but rather i was fascinated by the way the topic of love grips people. i mean if he had spoke of temptations, or the life of paul, or the woman at the well, i doubt the room would have been so quiet. so i cant logically attribute the aura of the room to the dynamic speaker that chuck happens to be...so what is it? sure he dominates the pulpit and tells stories like a champ, but why does teaching on love rivot us. and believe me if you would have been there you would have been quiet and reflective as well!...i mean i left and felt a bit jacked up and unable to hold a normal conversation for the next 30 mins. i think its safe to assume that when Truth penetrates, it automatically jolts our thinking and demands our attention. the message is what made the room feel powerful, because the message contained the Truth.

i mean when i try to take a step back from this "message" or "gospel" i can begin to understand why it is foolishness to those who don't know God!...i mean i need not explain the gospel to you guys, but have you really stepped out of our christian bubble long enough to think about the absurdity of our message? ha. but what is more...have you stepped out long enough to see brilliance of God's message? i mean if we boil down the Bible we can sum it up in the word LOVE (gal 5.14). it may be heretical for me to say it, but honestly sometimes i think the cross is so loving that it doesn't even affect me when i think about it. what i mean by that is that its SO loving that i cant even relate to it! i think im loving when i let someone have my seat or buy someone's dinner...i think im loving when i sacrifice an hour to help my brother fix his house...thats the extent of my self-sacrifice...thats my love in a nutshell...i can't even grasp the cross yall...ill be honest. so if the cross is hard for me to fathom, although it is the ultimate in sacrifices and the ultimate act of love, then why can a story about a little kid who gave a crappy gift to his rude teacher be so touching? why do i want to cry when i hear awesome stories of regular people that excute extraordinary love? i think it safe to say that when we see love in action, when we see selflessness, we see Christ! something, or rather, someone inside of us longs to be like that! im encourage to think God is wanting to pour out love through us too!

so my prayer is that while i dont understand the act of ultimate love on the cross, because i can't really relate, maybe the Holy Spirit might help me walk more closely as His word becomes a light unto my path, however faint it may be (because my eyes aren't where im walking half the time anyway). c.s. lewis' makes much sense when he states that, "christian love, either towards god or towards man, is an affair of the will." maybe as we experience the love of christ as we walk in his commands, and thus, showing our love for him, we might be able to find less reason to get angry in traffic or retailiate when we are wronged. and then, maybe we will find more reason to give, and more reason to encourage and more reason to build up. if im honest "taking up my cross daily" is a venture i have never set my eyes upon but i could fool you into thinking that i do it everyday. perhaps its when we walk in gods commandments that we might begin to understand the beauty of the cross and therefore Love. lets make no mistake there is a huge and encouraging correlation between love and truth...jesus.

i hope at least some of this made sense...its like 13 times better in my head...dangit.

jon

gratitude...

2006-11-26T23:11:00.000-08:00

i want to start up my blog again mainly so i can write out my thoughts and perhaps have some interaction and accountability regarding them as well. D.O thinks i hate blogs, this is not true...i may have thought you were gay when i met you back in high school, and you were right to assume that i thought that way, but i dont hate blogs and now i dont think you are gay either! whoop. i digress...

thinking a lot about gratitude lately. i think im beginning to see how far i have really fallen because of sin; and it makes me a fairly angry with satan. he's such a chump. he's great at what he does, ill give him that. perhaps your thinking, "what does that have to do with gratitude?" when i am reminded of the overwhelming grace and mercy of Christ's sacrifice, i begin to wonder, "why can't i live in this mindset?" and i begin to ask myself why i am so ungrateful when i have so much to be grateful for. then, i begin to think about the people (both christians and non-christians alike) im surrounded by on a daily basis and ask myself if i can see gratitude in their lives?

honestly, most of the time i think we aren't grateful. i mean i may be grateful in my time with the Lord in the mornings and maybe im really pumped about the blessing of life for an hour or two randomly throughout the day, but when a small setback grabs my attention...gratitude becomes selfishness and selfishness breeds all kinds of other struggles. perhaps 2 cor. 10.5's encouragement for us to "take every thought captive and make it obedient to Christ" requires more than a passing glance, but rather deep contemplation and focused prayer about what it means to really "take every thought captive". chuck colson hints at the necessity of our "captive thoughts" when he says, "that every decision we ever make has the potential to affect either heaven or hell"...whats it gonna be? EVERY decision? really? that means whether i choose to wear my black asics socks or my regular white footies can affect heaven or hell? surely not? well, im guessing chuck means, in this case, that its more our attitude in our actions or decisions that does the affecting. therefore, i can choose my black asics in a "heaven affecting way"...how? well, i suppose in this case i can say, when i see my sock drawer, "Lord, thanks for even letting me have the option to choose which socks i want to wear, because a lot of people don't have that option, etc..."...that thought would most likely lead me to other things i might be wearing that i am thankful for and perhaps then people i am thankful for! what does all that mean...well i've heard it said that "discipline comes before delight". its true! im convinced that when we become consumed with gratitude, we might be able to live just a sliver of paul's "contentment in any situation, whether in abundance or in need." here we see that its not the action of taking our thoughts captive that creates gratitude, but rather its this disciplined, "keeping in step with the Spirit (gal 5.25)" that might help us become thankful people. i guess before we are content we must be thankful, and before we can be thankful, we must understand what we have to be thankful for. i think paul defines it in philippians 4.3, "our names are in the book of life". our salvation is imperishable and unfading...we have a LIVING HOPE. although, we are wasting away everyday, and life is no fun sometimes, and good people get sick or die and we don't understand why, and we are hard pressed on every side and we feel like we can't win for losing sometimes...somehow, in the midst of all of that, there's this reassurance that this place is not our home! not only that, while we are here, because of Jesus, we are new creations and don't have to live in sin! we can be victorious. our identity in Christ gives us reason to be thankful...its the embrace of this reality that might bring about true gratitude and with it an entirely heaven-centered worldview! i want it! if you are reading this please take a minute to lift up my bro david mcleod and his family. he has non-hodgkins lymphoma and needs our prayers! thanks yall.

i'm back...i guess you know this...

2006-07-26T15:37:00.000-07:00

hey yall-
sorry it has taken so long for me to post this...i have been reprimanded for my lack of zeal in my postings...i want to thank you guys so much for your prayer support over the last month...it was much needed...want to especially thank mrs. templin for your awesome support...you were so excited to hear about my trip and i know that your thoughts were with me the whole time...

we made it back safe and sound and everyone still has all their appendages...although, at some points in the trip i almost took some of them off...no for real it was a sweet time to see christ working in the hearts of a culture that is lost...we stuck together as a team and i learned so much from these guys...most of it will take a while to process as i tell and retell the stories from our trip...

thanks again for your support and prayers, they were crucial! im excited to take this next step...but i wont lie im scared to death as well...i will be starting classes at dallas theological seminary in the fall and i will be working at saltgrass steakhouse as well...it seems the working world is calling and i guess i have to respond somehow! actually im really excited to get back into the working world...there are so many lessons there that i have missed out on for a long time...i will be going to school two days a week and working four days...

please keep the kazak people in your prayers...specifically: rawan, rustem, ruslan, and azamot...please also continue to pray for the m's there, jake and steph, as they devote themselves to spreading Joy! thank you guys and i hope someday i wont have to have these blogs to post about a trip i took and came back from...maybe i can just go there and stay...

jon david

No im not moving on to mikey, d.o.

2006-07-01T02:20:00.000-07:00

i thought it worthy to let you (d.o.) know that i fully hope to be roommates with both of you (i.e., d.o. and mikey) simultaneously...so heal your heart quickly cause my furniture is heavy!

for the rest of you guys-
wanted to let you all know that we are doing great! we have only a few days left and we are loving our new friends! they're hilarious! we will visit the banya again today or tomorrow! thank you! i think my mom was prolly embarassed by my last banya posting (sorry). i bet you liked it though g-money! thanks so much for your prs and thoughts. its so cool how father works...sometimes in subtle ways and sometimes outright for everyone to see...we met a brother here one night on a bus and he speaks and english and knows our father!!! he said he would love to meet our new friends and help tell them about Him...thank you! learning much about the life of m's here...gosh. they dont much care for the entrapment of "materialism"! oh if i could apply attention to that area of my life. somehow, somewhere there is a wall that blocks this knowledge and disgust of materialism from becoming a reality in MY life...it is so easy to talk about, but much harder to employ. miss you guys. please stay in the word cause i heard it makes our roots grow really deep and strong, like a tree beside a river.

jon david

oh man that was nuts...but ill spare you the details

2006-06-29T07:35:00.000-07:00

hey guys-
i wanted to let you know how our village experience went...it was crazy...we ate the head and back of a lamb...including the ears and brain and stomach and something else with tubes in it...it was a sweet experience. we traveled to the village with a local friend to visit his family who moved to kstan about 50 years ago. his father is the oldest in their village and he is a shepherd...freakin sweet to watch him in action with the sheep...did i mention the "m" and i got to herd the sheep with him on horseback!! heck yeah! in the rain no less...i felt like a cowboy for real. we put together a basketball goal from the walmart in greenville, texas and it now serves to bring joy to a small village on the other side of the planet...pretty sweet if you think about it! our team is holding up well, but i would be lying if i didnt say that i miss you all...the train ride there ended up only being 6 hours, but the ride home was much longer and more taxing! kazaks dont have time for privacy...they will sit right up in your lap if you arent firm...we now have about 5 days to chill with the bros that we taught the past two weeks! we are worn out, but excited. please keep us in your prs. father isnt done with us. i was convicted as i sat on the train and at home today, after reading this quote...i hope it might do the same for you as we all approach father...

"if we have never had the experience of taking our commonplace religious shoes off our commonplace religious feet, and getting rid of all undue familiarity with which we approach Father, it is questionable whether we have ever stood in His presence. the people who are flippant and familiar are those who have never yet been introduced to jc." -oswald chambers

-his

jon david

two crazy things happened today

2006-06-24T06:05:00.000-07:00

hey guys-
oh my gosh...what a weird day...i just got home from two crazy events. 1. joe (my crazy team member) and i, braved what is called the "banya"...essentially this is when you get naked with a bunch of old kazak dudes and beat each other in the back with some twigs...it's basically a sauna on steroids...you could only sit in the room for 2 minutes before everything on your body started tingling and stinging! oh my gosh i wish i could describe this heat adequately!!! it was like fire...seriously...everyone stared at us at first and then we were accepted into the family of old kazak naked dudes!...another strange part of this experience was that a lady in her 50's showed us what to do...she gave us our soap and towels and opened our lockers for us...keep in mind we are wearin' nothin but a smile...semi-awkward. hilarious though. the other event took place on our way home from the banya...a lady was laying on the curb with her head busted open and everyone was just staring at her! so we called the m and he came and we washed her up and the ambulance came 30 minutes later...the healthcare here is socialized, but not the best...actually its terrible...we still dont know what happened to this lady...either someone hit her with a car and left her there or someone beat her up...which is what i assume! it made me so mad when i saw her face! i trust that father will heal her. early tomorrow morning we will leave for a village. we will take a ten hour train ride northwest. we are bringing with us a basketball goal and a frisbee! i think our main objective is to love on some village children for about 5 days and hopefully show them our father! today we finished up our english camp by celebrating with a cookout...it was sweet. we ate burgers and hot dogs and played baseball...the weather here has been really nice the past few days, much like home except with huge brown mosquitoes that have no mercy. this will be the last post for several days...i hope i can update you on what happens these next five days. please pr for our impact on these new people we will meet! the language barrier will increase dramatically these next few days, since people in the villages know very little english. i miss you guys and hope that your doing great!

love never fails...1cor13.8...

jon david

sweet saturday...

2006-06-17T10:16:00.000-07:00

hey yall-
sorry about my posts being so scatter brained...i havent had much time to post in private...most of the time there is quite a bit distraction...i wanted to thank you for your prs and thoughts...i want to let you all know that our english camp has one week left and we look forward to getting to chill with our new friends most of the day! today we went to a local man made beach and ate some shashlik and chilled...father has blessed us so much and we have had a sweet time seeing his work here...

jody-you know that cottonwood tree that used to be in the dudes backyard across the street...and member how it dropped all its cotton in the spring?...well its like that except times 50, ooo...i mean there is cotton everywhere...it is getting a lot better, but the first week you could hardly walk down the street without breathing it in...you would have been so mad!...

please lift up a few guys...ruslan, zhangir, rajuan, and sergay...these are some friends that need our father!!! thanks so much...

i gotta go, but i will post some more later on!

mom whats the deal with blinn/dts stuff?

much love

jon david

details from the week...

2006-06-16T10:11:00.000-07:00

hey friends and fam-
wanted to check in let you know how everything is going...in short its going great...

in length...there are several themes running throughout our time so far: chess, cottonwood trees, the usual crazy asian driving, shashlik(awesome shish kebabs), english lessons, and sports, and heat! we had a couple of really nice days (wed-thurs), but the heat returned today! tomorrow we get to go to the beach with a few of our students and eat and chill! it should be sweet! except for the fact that the last beach we went to was more a like a really hot parking lot with lots of sharp rocks and some sand...i digress...

father has blessed us so much...several of our new friends have gotten the chance to hear about Him and i got the chance to play and share some songs about him! heck yeah! we trust his moving and working! thanks for your encouragement and i should be able to keep you informed more often because we just got email in our apartment! all these guys want to use this computer so i have to get off now but just know that you all are in my thoughts and i thank father for your support!!

nonnie- thanks so much for your "thoughts"...i really enjoyed playing speed scrabble with you a few weeks ago and if you wouldnt mind keeping your granddaughter out of too much trouble that would be much appreciated! i hope that i can visit with you about this place when i return!

jrod-bro...press on...study hard...give me money when you get out of school...yes...no...think about it?

kelly-you are so sweet!!

d.o.-i will prolly live with you in dallas yes?

mikey-if i dont like dallas i can live with you in cali? yes?

jody-i love you bro and i will call you asap!

wow...

2006-06-13T06:41:00.000-07:00

this brings me back to last summer when it was so difficult to put into words what has happened and the things we have experienced...i will try my best, but most things/experiences i unknowingly compare with last summer so bear with me...

by now we are well into our first week of english club/sports camp with about 18 kazak dudes...they are a lot of fun, but teaching is difficult. we have five groups that are taught by the other five bros with me, while i am a floater. i basically just help explain things that may be confusing and check on each group progressively throughout the day. we teach from 10-1 and then go to lunch with the guys and then we teach the guys a different sport from 2-4pm. this proves a challenge as well. for example, today we taught american football...most of the guys have an idea of what football is like, because they have seen rugby on tv, so without hesitation they pass the ball several times each down...frustrating at first and then it just became hilarious because there was no stopping it. after camp we usually go home and clean up and are usually invited out on the town with some of the guys that we teach. this means that we leave the house at 9 and get to bed about 1230 or 1...kind of tiring when you are in a building without air conditioning all day and then play sports in the heat of the day...nonetheless we are having a great time and the ground is more fertile than i expected. many of the bros are very interested in us and we are beginning to find out which ones may be being drawn by father. a sweet thing to see...

us six live in an apartment in a city about of about 600000. it takes about 20 minutes to get anywhere and this place is very wealthy, although you wouldnt guess that at first glance. there is a big gap btw the classes here...you are either really rich or really poor. we are all getting along great and it has been a joy to live with these guys and watch their passion...i miss you all and like last summer it has been difficult to keep my heart here, but i know father has work here to be done. this place is very expensive, unlike china. we pay about 4 dollars for a taxi and the m's pay $900/month for a house without air conditioning! so, we have to cook many meals...shopping for food is hilarious, and i have a great time not being able to speak russian or kazak, but can communicate with a smile and a wave and maybe a comment like "i like you bro and thats ok if you cant talk to me" followed by a point to the potatoes i want...kinda like that...anyway, i am now a firm believer that you learn more about english by teaching english than you do by learning english...

i hope i can continue to keep in touch with you guys, but i will insert that the internet connections here are shaky at best...as we speak it smells of burnt fuses... or something...

so i should end this quick...i miss you and love you all...thank you for your prs and love and please continue to lift us up...a good pr would be that each team member finds specific guys to connect with so that we can share about our father!!!! we are trying to get email back at our apartment, but we arent sure yet if it will work. thanks for your posts they are reviving...

much love-

jon david

d.o.-youre crazy as a cat...and i didnt think about it being so hard to be without my traveling companion...

it is hard to not have you guys here...im tired of explaining my phrases and games...either way it has been sweet to pass them on...

mom and dad and jody...i love you!

safe and sound

2006-06-09T03:05:00.000-07:00

hey guys-
not much time, but wanted to let you all know we are safe and sound with all the luggage and all the crew...hopefully will have time to tell you more later...thanks for the prs...

jon david

some late night/early morning thoughts...

2006-06-03T01:15:00.001-07:00

well, its 315 in the morning the day before bcamp(why is it that the super chill "meditation" or "thought" always comes, with much more effect, really early or really late?)... and i have decided it best to let you guys begin pring for some specific things while we prepare to leave...
-that we would be servants in every sense of the word (jh 3.30)
-that we would be bold with tr*th!
-that we would let father move when we aren't wanting to(willing spirts)
-i just hope to be a team that is selfless and humble...a dangerous pr, but a needed one...
-that bcamp would be a time to prepare in sp*r*t***ly for the journey and the task.

thank you so much for thinking of us and im excited about this opportunity. ive hear a ton of talk of giving, and pring, and fixing s*nfulness, but not much talk of thankfulness...im not too good at that necessary aspect of c living so can we talk about that more? i am richly blessed and if i talked about it more and became more thankful maybe i wouldn't complain so much...i suppose the "becoming" would preceed the "talking" but nonetheless...it is a task that requires help or deprivation to complete im assuming...

thanks for your thoughts--

jon david

gearing up for another amazing opportunity!

2006-05-22T23:22:00.000-07:00

i cant thank enough, those of you who have played a part in making this trip possible. i am amazed by the generosity and support of my family and friends. i am truly blessed. as you probably know if you are reading this post, i will be heading to central asia in a few weeks and my excitement is growing alongside the recognition of my inadequacy. we will be leaving on the 7th of june and returning on the 6th of july...so please keep us in your "thoughts". i hope that you will all check in from time to time so that i can be thinking of you too!...

getting crunch time...

2005-06-29T23:35:00.000-07:00

hey yall
this is perhaps the last post of the whole shootin match...perhaps when i return i might have some things to say...we shall see! our time here is practically over and my thoughts are leaning toward home severely...what is it that i have learned? several things, some best left unspoken but many i feel necessary and even critical to mention...

i read today a quote by g.k. chesterton that addresses my biggest lesson this summer: GREED...

"the best way to satisfy greed is to accumulate more and more, or desire less and less."

i guess when i came to china i thought...moths and rust are for the rich people...i came here and found that i am rich!
----
another area that has been brought to my attention with a great deal of persistance is: what i think about...what captivates me? what subject dominates my idle thoughts?

a few quotes that have proved useful, in the slightest, i will list...
c.s. lewis-"no subject of contemplation tends more to humble the mind, than thoughts of father"...

word-"take every thought captive and make it obedient to jc" 2 cor. 10.5

simeon wiel mentioned that we have to faculty of worship instilled in us...that worship is directed into this world or into another...we have no other option...idolatry or father?
----
one last area that has been a sweet lesson here is love...do i love people like 1 cor 13 says i should, if i am indeed of the Light?

c.s. lewis says, and i paraphrase without his prolific vocab, that when one falls in love they have indeed fulfilled the law (loving your neighbor as yourself, at least to one person)...they have put all thoughts of themselves aside and implanted anothers interest in the center of their being...they have leaped in one huge bound the massive wall of the self...this is a foretaste, an image of what it would be like to live LOVE, it is at least preparation for it.
----

lifting up hardcore that the plane ride from here to there would not blur the things father has tried to get through my hard head these past few weeks...knowing that people who write about greed and idolatry don't learn of its destruction without being living proof of it...knowing also that love i will never figure out, but can indeed grow in...hoping most of all that this wasn't a TRIP...trips are forgotten or perhaps remembered once in a while with pictures that are stuck together and faded...i know this has been a orchastrated time of at least showing me how temporary our time is and how fragile we are and also how important we are in spreading LOVE...not the 60s and 70s kind of love, but the living kind...

getting on a plane in two days...i ask one last time for your prs that i not get off that plane and land into the mold i just left...because hopefully father has made it to where i won't fit that one anymore...

i ask also that you continue to pr with me that these people would see the light and that the ones that have indeed come to know him would continue on in him!! father has been good to harvest here, but the work is far from done...we will leave brothers and sisters from the states here that havent thought of home in years because they have made theirs here...they put their hand on the plow and havent looked back...would you pr for their endurance!

the greatest of these is love...

jon

the bro's at a miao village last week/some other news...

2005-06-28T01:13:00.000-07:00

hey fam and friends,
wanted to take a sec to let you in on a few of thoughts lately...desiring home quite a bit...desiring also to stay pour out all that i have left and complete what father has for me here...its honestly a struggle to keep my thoughts in the "here and now". wishing that father would assist me in this battle...i guess if thats the worst of my battles each day, then i have much to learn from the beggars we have passed each week who battle to eat maybe once a day...humbling.

today, we traveled to a town and got to chill out with some bro's and a sis there...it was a pretty sweet time to encourage them! once again the overarching theme of my trip was re-embraced: 'i have it way too easy'...the brothers in that town are far from living an easy life! they live in poverty but have bigger smiles than i do. as i sport my patagonia shirt and my 90 dollars sandals...if this isnt a testament to the uselessness of earthly goods, i dont know what is...these bros had joy and they screamed it with their smiles in the 3 hours i saw them!

this town also had a factory/house that makes blankets with paintings on them...remarkable!
needless to say i picked a few out...from the factory we ate dinner with the bros and hopped on a bus at about 745pm...now you find me here at 1240am...

well the time here in big red is winding down quickly and im left with a long way home to gather my scattered thoughts and arrange my numerous lessons...im hoping to only apply them when i return so that fathers work on me here isn't left for me to foul up, but instead, left for me to build on.

miss all you guys...especially mom, dad, and broski...im glad yall had a good 29th!

mrs. templin...thanks for the shout out and im glad you found my site too!

allison smith...cant wait to see your face and thank you...are you sure you arent an angel? seriously...i dont say this to cause a tear or smile but rather to embrace your lifestyle...an encourager you are!

lola p...girl! how was thailand? i bet you felt that like a cat? cant wait to hear about it! thanks for the encouragement as well...see you in august, dressed in red!

jrod...another funny post by you...are you getting three hours credit this summer for your comedy class? that was dumb...

meg...heck yah ill come chill out with you and mike...i still havent met the bro yet! congratulations again and i will see you at the wedding...ill be there with bells on girl...

me and tanner in the mountains...

2005-06-26T06:02:00.000-07:00

well here's the first of the posted pics for the trip...i hope this gives you taste of the coolness that we get to see during the week! gosh! i think this pick is from week 3 and i really dont have any clue what the name of this town is but thats ok...

we have finished the pre-scheduled plans and now we are filling our week with a few day trips and some river play...it is about 9.10pm here in big red and we are bout to get some grub at suntrays(an americanesque chicken place)...i will agree that it is tragic but i must tell you that my desire for chinese food has lessened considerably and i dont know if this is due to lack of hunger or disagreeable menus...i just dont feel the food at this point...struggle...

tomorrow we the bp bros are taking a trip to a small town about an hour and half from here and we are gonna do some pwalking and some lookin around...it should be some sweet time...

yesterday we had an american vs. china basketball game at the college here in town and it proved to be an exciting event...they brought out the big guns, and i might add that both teams were well-equipped...the stands were filled and the crowd was extremely exciteable...it was so fun...we had two real referees and a chalk scoreboard on the wall! wish i could explain more but d.o. has a nice summary on his site and we have to eat...love you guys and cant wait to see you soon! i may post some more stuff later on tonight...

jon

2005-06-24T07:16:00.000-07:00

hey guys
another sweet time with the bros...
we had two 7 to 8 hour bus trips this last week. Both proved safe but they definitely included some sick people along the way...im thankful that i wasnt among the 10-12 people out of 20-25 who threw up or at least thought about it (i hope that gives some indication to the smoothness of the ride)...during the week we got to visit some high school classes and tell them about ourselves and our families...they loved seeing the pictures i brought and were really just thrilled to have us standing in their class...we drew pictures on the chalkboard of the U.S.(hilarious) and showed them where Texas was...tburk and i took the morning classes (9-10ish) and then stayed for some others after that...it was a blast! i think teaching here would be so cool! we sang some songs...you know like "im a little teapot", "deep and wide", "take me to your heart"...they were fun! the students here put our schooling to shame...they go from 720-1140 and then from 230-4ish and most have night class from 7-830ish...is that a joke! given i will say that our teaching methods are a bit more effective but they work so hard at learning...after chilling out in the classes we got to play some bball...you know i love that!

they next day we got to do some pwalking and some sight-seeing...we visited a miao village that was really really traditional and is famous for its resemblance of the Qing dynasty clothing and hair styles...pretty cool but kinda sad that it has turned into a tourist sight...

this week is to be filled with a chill day and a few day trips to some villages...i will hopefully keep you posted on what happens....we leave our base town on the 1st and return to you guys on the 3rd...getting excited about being home! i miss it!
encouraged this weekend by your comments...thanks so much again for your time and effort!

could use some pr's this week for the following:
-patience...that will do
-these people would see father in us
-that we would learn to love...
-safety for our return
-d.gilberts family and friends

thanks so much for your prs...they are needed and heard!

hey i have some things to say to some people real fast...

uncle mike...you made me real happy tonight when i read your comment...thanks so much for thinking of me each day and thanks for reminding me of pa tonight...his love for us was beyond words and im so glad that yall got to celebrate his bday last weekend...i wish i could have been there with yall...

agoad...girl, you make me smile every time...the dudes and girls in the classes that i talked to said you are so beautiful when i showed them your picture...i bet gtown is treating you well and im also stoked to get to talk about our summers when you get back...know that im doing the same for you as you are doing for me...thanks so much for your constant encouragement

jenny...girl, i met your husband...he travels with me every week...he's on my team and yall are getting married...thats all there is to it! he goes to tech and he is a stud...all the girls on our team want to date him but you are way better looking than they are and much cooler...lets face it! his name is tanner easley...look him up on facebook if you will...thanks for your prs and thoughts!

brooke b...ya youre awesome...thats all there is to it...and i went on a date with you...can you believe it? that was so fun...and also thanks so much for the encouragement this week!

chelsea o...girl dont you worry i will show you some pictures...it makes me happy that you get excited about china still...i hope im like that in a year! thanks for your constant encouragement to me...you always seem to smile and i think thats really a testament to who works inside you...thanks for your prs

kelly n and laura n...gosh...i wish i could let yall know how much i think of you two...not that you are the same person but when i think of thoughtful people you both seem to come to mind...i mean laura on the every bday and kelly comes in with the soup when i get sick...just two examples...the body at work i suppose...thanks for using your gifts you two...kelly i suppose "contributing with generousity" will apply to yall...thats awesome that r. 12 is your chapter too...i think it is well worth putting to memory...your prs have not gone unheard or unthanked...what a blessing to have your friendships

matty t...say dawg, hey thanks for the words bro...i appreciate you man...be careful with those chics, they are often trouble...maybe thats only for me...dangit. ya pa was a prime example of love bro...he never much cared for sugar coated love or soft words but he to be honest i prefer his raw, uncensored love much more...much missed...run hard core after Him dawg!!!! know that you are thought of over here man...

mama...thanks for the update from home...dont you worry i will be home soon...i will hug the crap out of you too! cant wait to see yall! some american food will be just fine with me...im glad to see that yall are enjoying your summers...i think yall needed one...hows jody? i miss him! im looking for something small to get yall but im not too good at getting gifts you know...i will do my best...happy 29th anniversary on the 26th...ya yall can go on a date if youd like! ha! hows dad likin the hybrid 2? i bet he's likin it a lot...

reminded of this daily:
if i speak in the tongues of men and of angles but have not love im nothing...if i have the power of prophesy and can discern all mystery and all knowledge and have all the faith as to remove mountains but have not love i am nothing...if i give away all i have and give my body up to be burned but have not love i gain nothing!!!
love is patient, love is kind, it does not envy or boast...it is not rude or arrogant...it does not insist on its own way...it is not resentful or irritable...love does not rejoice with wrongdoing but rejoices with the truth...love bears, believes, hopes, and endures all things...
love never ends...as for tongues they will cease as for prophesy it will pass away and as for knowledge it will pass away...for we know in part and we prophesy in part but the perfect comes the partial will be done away with...the greatest of these is love!!!!

hope to live just a sliver of it...

jon

given too much,

jon

am i really here...?

2005-06-19T06:52:00.000-07:00

nimen hao ma? (how are yall?)
gosh, its good to hear from all of you and im stoked to know that you have taken time out of your day to spend on me...just wanted to let yall know how pumped i am that father has given me this opportunity and now my focus is not wasting the precious time that i have to pour out myself completely so that he might win some!! its hard communicating but its has gotten much easier over the past couple weeks...i can usually understand what the conversations that i hear are about, but cant hold much of one aside from introductions and greetings...i really love this language though and would not be oppossed to trying to learn it someday...i just have like 10000 more characters to learn! hilarious and awesome...

last week was a blast and not much different in content than the first three! stoked about leaving tomorrow morning at like 630 to head really far south(8 hours) to a town there...we will hopefully be staying there for the week and heading back on thursday to finish up the week with some whitewater rafting! heck yah...

this is an amazing place!! the people are as intrigued by us as we are by them...i hope that our smiles do more than evoke one in return...i hope they see our passion for something greater...hard sometimes to keep that outlook, but we have to hope in his power knowing that he doesnt need words to show his love...

im am feeling much better now most of the sickness is gone and i thank you for your prs in that area...

also, i heard today that a family friend david gilbert went home...tragic for his family and close friends...i ask that you would lift them up right now as you read this, knowing that He hears...this news tends to magnify the reality that life is both temporary and meaningful...if i knew the way it feels to lose a brother, i suppose i wouldnt try describing it...

thanks so much again for all your posts...they make me so happy at the end of the week!
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

zack smith...you are so good at guitar/songwriting...are you kidding me...give me a cd...thanks also for your encouragement...everyone go to iamalden.com for some sick tunes and wisdom...

whitney...i dont know which one you are but i like both that i know...either cousin or white thank you so much for your post...i wish i could have been in nocona this past weekend...if its whitney weir than thank you so much for your thought and tell your sister that she is in troub. with me...if its whitney white that i really appreciate your post and it makes me happy that you would take the time to look at my blog...

mom...thanks for the post...and no im not disappointed about the non-post last week i just wanted to know how everything was going with yall...

julie anna...cant member if i responded to your post...but yes my hair is a bit more blonde than you left it and the chinese really seem to like it! thats good because i like them too...hope kk is treating you well and i want to hear about all your kiddos when you get back! thanks for being tight!

matt- bro im stoked to see you growing! you are so tight and i hope that this finds you deep in the sword and in constant conversation with father...in his presence is fullness of joy...heck yah!!!!

amber and jrod and drewbie...dangit i miss you like way more that i miss campo verde's or even my car...cant wait to chill out with you...

hoping that i would learn more of love and how to live it...i feel like 1 cor. 13 is pretty clear about its importance...its more important that knowing or trusting or giving...gosh...my pr for you all and me is that together we would learn how to pour out the love we have been given...its a hard pill to swallow when i substitute "jon" for the word "love" in that chapter and see how untrue it really is...its a good bit of free humiliation...

sorry about the length of this post...i told you before they wouldnt be so long...strug...

the greatest of these is love,

jon

alive and kickin'

2005-06-17T23:15:00.000-07:00

hey yall
gosh!! another tight week filled with fathers direction and a bunch of bus rides a few train rides and a few miles on the trail...all good! finished the majority of our goal this week and next week is looking like a sweet change of pace...we will take an 8 hour bus ride and go from there...excited about that!!! thanks dad for the ipod...it will help immensely.

this week contained a few different stories worth telling...but not on here...just know that pops is always looking out for us and continues to "establish our steps"...its funny how right solomon is...

we will lose our pack this next week and sport the chacos for the first time...it will be a light load...happy about that!

the food here continues to be good...had my favorite meal today in a different town...it consisted of: pork and peppers, la jiao (kinda like chinese hot sauce...pure), basically a dish of bacon and green onions, soup with tofu and cabbage, fried noodles with pork, and steamed rice, and dont forget the pepsi...not to bad huh...

funny and at the same time amazing to see how pops is working simultaneously here and there and everywhere...ive always been impressed with that imagination...mountains here are beautiful still, rivers flow both brown and some of blue depending prolly on the locality of the coal factories...either way they are spectacular...the bus drivers dont care at all...they assume hit you with the bus than wait for you to move...humorous sometimes...seen a few wrecks...glad that i wasnt in them...

having a great time with the bros! i have learned a lot from each dude, especially our leader...gosh bro is all over loving on people...truly sold out...doesnt care much for talking without action or hearing and not doing...good to see and also humbling!

man, i wish i could be there to talk with all of you! soon...

who lee anna-thank you so much for your encouragement!! you are so cool...if you would give me your email address i will write some more things about how tight you are...

matt(cuz)-thanks man...you are a stallion...i hope things are kickin with you and all is well...i appreciate your prs.

lrouse-keep those kids in line you hear...14 is twice as many as i could handle...so glad to hear that you are enjoying llyc...cant wait for second half! tech writing is gonna be tight!

jrod-bro, save more lives...stand strong upon your feet and dont get distracted by lauren rich. if she shows her face at the pool...i know you just laughed...haaaaa...step on amtraks foot for not replying to my email last week...my heart breaks in my hand...dumb

drewbie-i hope i can make hsb...we shall see...i miss you broski

laura nutter-like you are soooo sweeett...you should be a cake! you know everyones bday and you lift up everbody you know all the time...want you to know that i think really really highly of you...like real high...thanks again and i know you are heard by pops...

happy to know you all

jon

leaving on tuesday so i will try this again

2005-06-13T00:09:00.000-07:00

hey to all
cant believe i get another chance to inform yall on whats going on here...its a blessing in itself to get to jot down my thoughts to you all...i havent been able to check my blog comments from yall, because we only get to use "that" computer on saturday afternoons...so thank you if you have posted something for me...it truly is a huge encouragement to read things from my people. if you have something you may want to tell me and dont want to post it you can email me at my address (in an earlier blog).

well, we have 17 days left until we reach U.S. soil but our work here is not done...we have so much loving left to do...its an amazing opportunity to share with these people something bigger and better than their fancy cell phone holders and their hero yao ming...

im pretty sickly these days...i have the sinus stuff...but i know father will give me the endurance to complete next week's excursion. im excited to be stretched more...

our group seems to be bonding well...our leader is so tight...bro is a pure example of humility and i need that...

i just got out of a hair cut/45 minute massage that cost $1.24. pure! ill take it...

i will continue my list of a few things that chinese people love: crown molding, michael jordan, celine dion, they still love staring at us, saying "hullo" (british style), hot food, very little leg room...

learning much about grace...and that i dont possess much of it...forgive me of that...learning a little of what love looks like, hope that father will give me the ability to love more like him...unconditionally...wow, what a challenge...

hoping that you would join me in lifting up our group by the direction of r chapter 12?...its been such a blessing to use fathers words to direct my weakly attempts at pr. cant thank yall enough for your support of our team...i know that you are lifting us up and we need it!

jrod-bro i miss you like a champ...you sit on that lifeguard stand and save lives...you hear me...
agoad-girl...you are in guatemala(sp)...being really tight so you prolly arent checking this, but i miss you too!
amtrak-hows espanol? sorry to hear about the dropping of classes...strug...its ok we can be in cosc together at 11something next session!! 6 weeks is a long time for us to not talk...dont like that too much...
jessi- i better hear from you if you are reading this...if not im coming down there! just cause you are secretary of the big time sorority doesnt mean you dont have to talk to me anymore...joke.
kelly n-thank you so much for you encouragement...you are the nicest person i know...like seriously
drewbie-i miss your comedy...wish i could have some funny faces from you buddy...cant wait to hear of your camp experiences
blake-dont think you are checking this because you dont do computers...but i love you bro
kstew-you are prolly somewhere in africa loving on kids at the moment...i think much of you
chelsea o- thank you as well for you comments...i cant wait to talk with you about this place
bonnie-you are going to love this place!
luther boys- miss you much...but we will have a sick pingpong tourney with our newly purchased racquets...ya buddy
logan- i especially miss your french but you wont read this because you are ruling over pc
mom and dad and jody-what is goin on at home...you can email me...its not taboo...and would love to hear!
minininininniii- i miss you girl...i hope colorado and drew dawg are treating you well...i trust you are thriving...tell your sis hi for me...shes tight!
uncle mike and aunt jan- thanks so much for you encouragement...i needed it...tell your "club" thanks for the prs....janice i will give those cds back soon...hopefully
beads-thanks for the encouragement as well...i thank you are so tight...homepage huh...what an honor!!
lrouse-mountain scaler you...hope you are alive...i emailed you...you havent so far felt the email back...forgiven.
mallory-forgot to thank you for your encouragement from way back in the day...thank you...i think you are so sweet, to boot!
leese-girl...i dont really know what to say about your constant encouragement...blessed to know you will have to suffice...so glad to hear that latvia is going well...continue to love on em'!
tbomb and mikey-umm yall are tight...hope comanche is treating you well bro! cant wait to hear of your new hiring as mayor of that town...mikey-seriously...sounds like you are being dominated by father...so sweet to hear...so sweet! cant wait to continue learning from your example!
molly allen- if you are reading this...you need to know that i was thinking of grace the other day and your name came to my head...thats all i have to say about that...
a.reuben-please be drawing near to father!! please...miss you guys and cant wait til august! stay strong this summer!

blessed to know you all!! my words are empty but fathers arent!! heck yeah...

sitting, like you in much grace-

jon

another chance...so ill take it!

2005-06-11T23:35:00.000-07:00

well i had said a bunch of things to you all...but i just deleted about an hour of typing because this keyboard doesnt work right...now im high from the dude smoking weed outside and a little frustrated about all my shout outs that have been erased...i guess its a lesson...well, i cant retype all of that but wanted yall to know im thinking of you and love you all...the shout outs will have to wait till next week...zaijian nimen (goodbye yall)

jon

another week of grace

2005-06-10T22:57:00.000-07:00

wow! this week was amazing...complete with so much more than i can describe! but i will attempt what little i can adequately describe. we stayed two nights this week in a small hotel and one night in a villagers home who was more than gracious, even bordering on annoying. but all the more he showed how to be generous...i can use that lesson...its sad and convicting that you can learn of generousity and service from a people who know nothing of our provider...humbling to say the least. we began last week eating dinner cooked by a nice lady with a baby, whom she breast fed on several occassions throughout the night with no hesitation... humorous to watch others reactions...it was a meal dad, mom and jody would love...fried cabbage, rice, la jiao(ground peppers in water), and tofu(dofu in chinese)...we were just thankful for some fill. we stayed in a hotel that night and the next day we traveled a really long way to the villagers home that progressed from a brief visit to a day and a half visit. we just sat around the house on little stools (of which i hope to construct when i return) watching his kids throw their pet owls on their dog's back...accompanied also by tying a massive flying beetle to a string and watching it fly around and make the dog really mad...hilarious...sidenote: all the dogs here look the same...most are like aunt lesa's dog (joe frank) except without the curly tail...for others who arent my family i cannot really describe it adequately. this nice fella was a city police officer, but perhaps not the most honest of them all. he told us we must stay and eat dinner and then he would walk us to town, because he had to go to work anyway...so, he dressed up in his camo fatigues and sat down and smoked like 17 packs of cigarettes before dinner and watched his kids with us...he was so chill...well it ends up bro does not go to work that night but does in face keep his camo on...hilarious...the next morning we rise late (about 945) and climb down the ladder (a house built "little house on the prairie" style, except with a chinese twist) only to have him tell us we need to sit and rest and eat...none of which we needed at that point...but we succumbed...we finally left the village and he walked with us half way down to the next town and then stopped, which leads us to believe he was neither going to work nor was he a cop...also humorous.

i apologize for the length of that story...i will try to keep them shorter for your times sake...an element here that is not held in high regard...time.

leaving the village on wed. we got what we needed from the next town without much complication but definitely with much attention, complete with a basketball shoot around and lots of kids.

from there we took a bus back to the first town and slept in a hotel. we got up at 515 on thurs morning and took a long boat ride up river to our last town...the boat ride was spectacular, complete with a few fellas who enjoy the 630am pot smoke...make your own mental picture if you wish...

the end of last week was uneventful...we were given grace enough to get plenty of info from the last town and then we took a solid two hour bus ride home.

sorry if this was too much info...i will prolly not do this again...i apologize also for the grammer errors, i know they are numerous.

i will do my best to leave a separate blog for pr requests...thanks so much for all your effort on our behalf

allison smith you are amazing!!! like you are so tight!
megan so are you!
tbomb and mikey yall are dudes that im so blessed to know...i trust this finds yall deep in your swords!

in too much grace

jon

one more chance to write for the week

2005-06-05T21:25:00.000-07:00

hey all
i wanted to seize the opportunity to write one more time before i lose it for a few days...right now its 8.49pm here on sunday night and in atown it should be 7.51am...that means that most that would be reading this are waking up for some ''club'' in a little bit...club here is a bunch of fun and a time that is crucial for our teams unity...its been really pure to get everyone together every week...tomorrow our team heads out again to the countryside 'hoping' with fathers help to continue his work. the bros were talking today as we walked down the street for dinner about what we have learned so far and it was good time of bonding for us and really cool to see how pops challenges us all in different ways...

i wanted to thank each one of you for writing me!! you dont know how good it is to hear from you guys back home...i forgot to thank some of you though...i was laying in bed thinking about how tight it was to hear from yall...

allison - i dont really know which allison it is that posted such an awesome blog, so if you could let me know i would love that...and thank you for your prs

craig and lesli and the boys - thanks so much for your encourgement as well...i appreciate yalls willingness to give and know you are lifting me up, and for that im am truly grateful...i also wanted to let you know that i think so highly of how your family runs, it is a testament to dads work in you both...

charles...you are prolly the funniest man alive...i love to see fathers joy in you!! continue that pleaseeee!

i hope i havent fogotten anyone...if so im a jerk and will try to remember them throughout this week and get back to you this next weekend.

i am hoping that for those of you who are reading this each week that you could be lifting up some specific things and hopefully i will have updates when we return- that the bondage to alcohol would be broken off of these people, these people would have their eyes and ears open to the good news, our teams energy (its really hot during the day as we are hiking), that we would live out what our friend paul says in his book to rome in the twelfth chapter (this section of word is my pr for myself throughout the trip and it would make me happy if you could lift that up for our team as well)...thank you so much for your prs, they are crucial!!

dad and mom and jody...i love you all so much and thank father so much for giving me your love...

if any of you have specific things that you dont want to post i have setup an account that i will be checking as well its: jontettleton@yahoo.com

you are in my thoughts...

2005-06-03T11:28:00.000-07:00

hey to all...
i hope my last posting and this posting are actually posted...i cant really read anything on the screen except what i type so i hope that its working correctly...well, im here in our city and our team of 5 is back from our first trip to the countryside...it was awesome! we hiked a long way and i got my first shower of the week yesterday, so that was nice...i trust that you all are doing well at home! i miss you all so much...im learning so much here!! the food is amazing and im picking up the language somewhat decently...our leader is a stallion on the language...he speaks like 4 or 5 dialects and doesnt even care!! im learning so much from him...so far i have had a great time with the bros and we are getting along just fine...t-burk, jamies, d.o., peeps, and i are needing you to lift us up when you get a chance...mostly ask that we would get done what father wants to get done...that we would remove ourselves from the attention and that serving him would be our focus...

this is a beautiful place...there are mountains in every direction...jody you would love it here...minus all the people that talk extremely loud...how is work going? are you the head architect yet?...good...my pack is working great and its a perfect size for my necessities, which boast mainly water...last night i got to play ping pong for the first time on the street and it was a blast. i played some street dude who was apparently betting people...he called me out and i followed suit...i lost 12-14 but was rather excited at my effort...i think he could have beaten me worse but maybe i can test him again next weekend...

as foreigners we draw a crowd everywhere we go...at first it was awesome and most of the time funny but when we are in small villages it hinders our progress somewhat...(that is a situation that you could lift up for us when we are out in the countryside)...

mom, we got to visit a school (200-300 kids) the other day and you will love seeing the pics from that...they were so excited slash freakin out...we got to go around and introduce ourselves to a few of the classes and they were very sweet kids...how is school?..i hope it is going well...im continually lifting up your patience...

dad, you would love the countryside as well...the mountains and streams are beautiful and the people are so kind...i dont think you would like the food or the tea though...(no sugar and lots of leaves)......how is the golf?
when i get back i will be ready to take you on again with more vigor...

i look at yalls pics often and am constantly thinking about what yall are doing when im walking...like right now jody is prolly getting close to bed in about an hour because its 9:59pm and mom is tired too...dad is still hanging in there by the t.v....ya know stuff like that...

there are a few things that chinese people love and i will share them with you all:
cell phones, leather cell phone belt clips(males), kenneth cole style shoes(males), staring at americans, being really loud, the color blue...the list goes on but i will save some for later.

ambbbberrr, jrod, agoad, blake, kstew, areuben, and others that i miss a lot...you guys are awesome and i think about you so much when im walking...amber when i get back we are getting some sonic and we are gonna eat cookies too!! jrod...golf without a doubt...amber i was gonna send you a bday card to 1107 gridiron but im not sure if thats the right address and now i wont have time to send you a bday card before your bday(it takes like 2 weeks)...sorry girl...but email me your address so i can send you something sometime...agoad, you tear up that camp this week...love on em hardcore...

im sorry all that this is the most randomly put together blog of all time...but im out of practice and have so much to say...A-reuben if you are reading this i hope that you are getting deep in your swords lately and that you are learning so much...

if there is one thing that i have learned so far it is that i take fathers blessings for granted...these people have nothing and i have everything and more and still i ask for more...forgive my selfishness...

i wish you all the best and know that im thinking of you often...

What an intriguing people!!

2005-05-26T17:34:00.000-07:00

wow!! i will try to type this again...the computer is mostly chinese and im not that advanced...i dont have much time but wanted to let you guys know whats going on these days...im in an aweswome city on the way to our destination...we stayed up for about 27 hours including flight time and waiting time and then a four hour flight yesterday to augment that...today we have a bus ride through the mountains which promises to be amazing... yesterday we had a great time in the city playing frisbee with about ten people and with an audience of about 100...these people are so interesting!! me and d.o. took pics with some girls yesterday that prolly thought we were nsync...it was sooo funn!! we will be starting up backpacking in a few days and im stoked about it...please be lifting up our team in this time for strength, that we would lose our pride, that we would be expended, that we would learn to love and that the communication that is so difficult will be established...thanks so much guys and i wish i could tell you more but i will have to save some...areuben...stay strong this summer!! find rest in father and read the good book as much as you can!! i miss you all!!

totally unworthy, but totally going...

2005-05-14T23:35:00.000-07:00

gosh, i feel so inadequate to fly overseas with someone else's funding and enjoy loving on people and checking out the place!! heck yeah...what a deal! in today's world that seems unfair and in fact it is! so, again i thank every one of you who gave when you didn't have to and even more so for those who are continually yarping on our team's behalf when you don't have to...we will be taking off on the 24th and i hope that i can embark on something that helps me to lose my materialistic, impatient, prideful attitude...i know pops has plenty to teach me, if you could be asking him to nudge us a little that would be sweet...i really just wanted to take a moment of your time to let you know kinda how i feel before i go...UNWORTHY...but I'M TOTALLY GOING!!!...
p.s. if you have any comments on my posts while im away just click the "comments" button and select "anonymous", but please put your name at the bottom so i will know who you are!! thanks guys and be good...

to the IMPACTERS

2005-05-10T01:56:00.000-07:00

hey camp,
im just want you guys to know that while im gone i will be thinking of you often! stay strong and remember that dad totally loves you even when its hard to see...yarp for 2009 for sure and remember that sometimes its good to talk to dad just because hes awesome, not for any other reason! try to make time to see him often and listen even when its hard...you guys are a huge encouragement to me and ill prolly cry come august when we depart...i miss you guys already and i know that this summer will provide many lesson for all of us...i challenge you to invest in people this summer...that means the waitress/waiter, the gas station attendant, the jerk boss, your parents, whoever...try to see in them a "reflection of eternity, a glimmer of something startling and infinite"-a really smart man. amber j, you are the coolest and its been a sweet ride together so far and august promises to be sweeter! i will miss your constant encouragement this summer but i will try to be yarp-ing for you as much as i can...hang in there with natalee, dad can help here for sure...i miss you guys already and i havent even left yet!! read the middle book dad gave us if you are feeling down and it should encourage you! gosh yall are tight!! reaching...

a thank you and a few reminders...

2005-05-09T14:01:00.000-07:00

well folks, we are counting down the days and im getting a bit nervous/excited to experience this summer...i cant thank you guys enough for your support and encouragement! im so thankful for you and i am blessed, to say the least...

this website is for you guys (especially mama) ...i hope to be updating it whenever possible while in "the East" to let you know what all is going on...please post things before, after, and especially during so that i can keep up with you all...you can post something and also see what everyone is writing by clicking on the "comment" section below

if you wouldn't mind talking to dad about a few things for our team:
-ability to love
-energy
-boldness
-to be poor in spirit

thanks yall!